Not For Me
by animalover123
Summary: After catching May cheating on him, Drew runs into some trouble and has to decide the best for him and May. One-sided Contestshipping. Hoennshipping  Not wanted but needed


**WARNING: Contains MY interpretion of the afterlife in the Pokemon World. Please don't take offense. Thank you and enjoy!**

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><p><strong>Drew's Point of View<strong>

The sun was setting just as I walked into my girlfriend's apartment building in high spirits. The doorman was sitting behind his booth reading today's paper. I walked up to him and the elderly man lowered his newspaper before smiling kindly at me.

"Hello Mr. Hayden!" He said cheerfully. "Here to see Miss Maple again?"

I smirked to myself. I spent way too much time here.

"Indeed I am," I responded.

The doorman chuckled, "You've got good timing boy. Miss Maple just walked in not five minutes ago with another gentleman with her."

I shrugged nonchalantly. "Probably her brother, Max. May told me she was visiting him today."

"Then shall I call her and tell her you're here?" The doorman nudged his head in the direction of his ancient telephone.

"No thanks Alex," I said. "I'm actually surprising her. Today's our one year anniversary since we started seeing each other."

"Is that so?" The doorman asked. "Well congratulations to you Mr. Hayden!"

I nodded, "Thanks again Alex." I slid him a twenty and left before he could shout his protests. As strange as it is, I kind of enjoy my conversations with Alex. He always reminds me of my late father. It actually makes me feel a little sad though. But I shoved that issue out of my head for now. The only topic I wanted to focus on was my girlfriend, May. I could hardly believe that it had already been a year since we started dating.

I sighed impatiently. The antique elevator in May's apartment wasn't coming anytime soon. So I decided to take the stairs instead. It was a good thing May's apartment was on one of the lower levels of this building. I walked up to May's home, Apartment 2D. I heard muffled giggles behind the door but quickly disregarded it. I reached down and scooped up the spare key hidden underneath May's doormat before unlocking the door. The giggling in the room abruptly ceased as I opened the door.

May was sitting on her couch, facing towards the door. I was about to smile at her and reach for the rose in my pocket when I froze at the sight of the guy sitting towards her. This guy was most definitely not Max. He had coal black hair in contrast to Max's teal hair. Even with his back towards me, I could tell it was Brendan, one of my rivals. But the thing that shocked me the most was that May and Brendan were _kissing_.

There was no mistaking the faint blush on May's cheeks and the heavy breathing from Brendan. My initial reaction was mixed. It ranged from betrayal, hurt, and anger. I felt my heart stop, then race again at twice the normal pace. The sudden change was painful. I saw May's sapphire orbs widen in shock at the sight of me. She was probably surprised at getting caught. Brendan, feeling her lack of response, followed May's gaze to me. I was still standing at the doorway. My expression must've been quite a sight since Brendan's grinned in triumph and arrogance.

I wanted to yell, scream, throw a fit, or just whatever. Anything would be fine.

A strangled, almost whispered, "oh" escaped my lips. The words I wanted to shout choked in my throat before I could pronounce them. Unable to say a word, my feet managed to turn me around and walk me back to the stairs. I thought I heard May's pleads for me to come back and Brendan's calming words. The blood pulsing to my brain nearly drowned out the outside world. The only thing I could feel were the rapid beats from my aching and throbbing heart.

May cheating on me hurt. It hurt more than when I had broken my wrist when I was five. It hurt more than when I sprained my ankle when I was twelve. And it hurt more than when my father passed away a couple of days ago when I just reached eighteen. But the thing was that all the worst injuries I experienced in the past could never prepare me for the heart shattering pain May inflicted on me. Why would Arceus ever create us to feel this kind of torture? The pain of rejection; the pain of betrayal; the pain of loss.

By now, I had reached the lobby where Alex was waiting for me to give me back my money, like he always does. He must've noticed my expression.

"Is there something wrong Mr. Hayden?" I heard him faintly ask. Or maybe that was just me. This all felt like a dream. Or maybe a living nightmare. If only it were a figment of my imagination though. But this was no doubt reality. My mind wasn't capable of creating this kind of heartbreak.

I ignored Alex and bounded straight out the door. It was nightime already. I sighed tiredly. I tried to let the crisp nightime air clear my muddled head, but it had the opposite effect of what I wanted. My thoughts would always drift back to May.

With Brendan.

Rage, pure fury, filled every fiber of my body and I trembled in anger. I almost stormed back into the building just so I could beat the crap out of my rival. But before I could, a loud cold voice cut through my thoughts.

"Hey, you there!" But I ignored the voice and continued to walk. Wait, I'd been walking? Stupid subconscious. Great, now I'm lost in this totally unfamiliar city. What a perfect way to end my day.

Suddenly, a blunt force slammed against the back of my head and I stumbled forward in the impact. Stunned, I felt the back of my head and was shocked to feel a warm, sticky substance on my fingers. I whirled around in anger.

"What the -?"

There had been five guys behind me. The leader, I assumed, had an malevolent grin on his face.

"I got your attention now, didn't I?" His stupid followers snickered in response. That was when I figured out that they had me surrounded. Five guys against one. I may be "arrogant" but I'm not stupid to recognize the dangerous situation I was in.

"What do you want?" I snarled through my clenched teeth.

The leader ignored me and looked like he was studying me. He suddenly grinned at me as if he figured something out in the empty space where his brain is supposed to be.

"I recognize you," he said. "You're that Andrew Hayden guy! You know boys, the boss of Hayden Industries." The other guys nodded and agreed in unison. After dad died, I inherited his gigantic industrial chain. It had been on the top headlines for the last couple of days.

The leader started to pace back and forth while eyeing me hungrily. His stare was rather unsettling but I refused to back down and cower.

"Now I'm wondering," he mused. "What's the head of a multi-million dollar company doing at lil' ol Petalburg? I would've thought you would be in LaRousse."

"That's none of your business!" I spat. This guy must've hit me pretty hard since the world was starting to spin a little. He and his goons were starting to look a little like blurs rather than people.

The leader, noticing me stumble a bit, grinned maliciously at me.

"You look a little dazed," he said. "Why don't we help him out boys?"

The four other men suddenly flew towards me and I braced myself to defend myself. But my head must've been really messed up since I was barely able to deflect the first punch. A second punch caught me in the stomach and it was all downhill from there. I crashed onto the concrete floor and a spasm of pain ripped through me as my skull connected with the hard floor. I was too fazed to notice the flurry of punches aimed at me. I drifted in and out of consciousness as the pain thickened and worsened. I was barely able to breathe through my crushed ribs and the blood clogged in my throat. The attacks finally stopped and the men pulled away. I saw the leader grinning at me viciously. He had a crowbar in his hands. Where did he get that from? But the question flew out of my head as he raised it above his head. I faded into the darkness just as he brought it crashing down to my head.

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><p>I fidgeted a little before opening my eyes. I was in a small white bed with metal railings. I immediately recognized the horrible shade of wallpaper, the blinding flourescant lights, and the sound of people bustling in and out of rooms. In other words, I was in a hospital. How did I get here? The last thing I remembered was getting nearly beaten to death in a random street of Petalburg.<p>

And May.

I swallowed thickly and felt my eyes prick uncomfortably. Pain gripped my heart and threatened to crush it. I sat up in the small bed and held my head in despair. How could she..? All those giggles and blushes, was she secretly thinking of Brendan? Were all those hugs and kisses a lie?

I had to know. Screw all this health and medical stuff. If I didn't know how May felt, than I'd probably really die. I was Andrew Hayden, I could do whatever I wanted. jumped off the bed and quirked my eyebrows a little in surprise. There was no pain. At least physically. I would've thought that there would be plenty of that especially after my brutal beating. But, hey, I wasn't complaining.

It took a little longer to sneak out of the hospital though since nurses and doctors were nearly everywhere. But, like I said, I'm Andrew Hayden. Luckily for me, there was a taxi waiting outside and I hopped into it in a hurry.

"Hey there!" The driver smiled. He started driving off before I told him where I was going.

"The Emerald Village." I sounded a little breathless.

"No problemo kid." He hummed quietly to himself as I stared out the window. Buildings and trees whizzed by and I felt my head nod. My eyes started to close..

"Here you are kid!" I blinked. Woah, that was way too fast. I probably fell asleep or something. I reached for my wallet when I discovered that I was still in a hospital gown. That's rather embarrassing.

"Uhh.." I said awkwardly. "I'm sorry, but I don't have any money on hand with me right now. but-"

"Oh, don't worry about it kid." The driver smiled at me through the rear-view mirror. "It won't be an issue, trust me. Besides, you look like you're in a rush."

Was it that obvious? Whatever, I got a free taxi ride. That was good enough for me.

"Thanks." I quickly got out of the cab before he could change his mind. I walked into the apartment building and stopped in my tracks. Instead of Alex, another guy was there as the doorman. He had spiky brown hair and equally brown eyes. He was reading the same newspaper as Alex but with his feet propped on top of the booth. I blinked in confusion before stepping outside again. This was the right apartment building. But where was Alex?

"Hey there. You lost buddy?" What's with all the friendly people in this city? It's pretty unnerving. I walked back in and shook my head.

"No," I replied. "I'm fine."

"Okay then." And the man returned his attention to the newspaper before him.

But something was still nagging on my mind and I had to get it answered.

"If you don't mind me asking," I started, "Do you know where Alex is?"

The man cast me a confused look, "I'm sorry, who?"

"Alex, the other doorman," I explained. "He's usually behind the desk you're sitting in."

The doorman shook his head. "No idea what you're talking about man. I'm the only doorman behind this desk. Sorry kid."

I rolled my eyes. Nevermind, I'd deal with this later.

"I'm here to see someone then." The doorman nodded.

"Name and apartment number?"

"May Maple, Apartment 2D."

"Shall I ring her up?"

I thought about it for a minute before slowly shaking my head.

"No thank you." It came out as a soft whisper.

The doorman cast me a worried glance. "Hey kid, you alright?" It somehow annoyed me that he called me "kid." He looks like he's the same age as me!

"I'm fine," I nearly growled.

"Your girlfriend?" The guy asked me with an amused grin.

I shot him an annoyed look before sighing. "Not sure anymore."

The man shrugged indifferently. "It's alright kid. We all go through girl problems one way or another. But at least get yourself dressed properly. You don't want your girlfriend to see you in that, do you?"

Oh right, my hospital gown. Five minutes later, I walked out of the men's bathroom wearing a startling blank white t-shirt and a just as white long pair of pants. The doorman, he told me his name was Gary, had given them to me.

Gary snickered quietly to himself.

"Alright lover boy," He said. "Go get her!"

Not as easy as you think. I rolled my eyes at him before stepping into the elevator. I knew I was being lazy; May's apartment was only three floors up. But I did just get out of the hospital, and despite not feeling anything, I didn't want to risk it.

I took a deep breath to calm myself before the elevator dinged! The door slid open and I hesitantly walked out. May's door was wide open and I smiled at the thought of her waiting for me. But I quickly batted down the idea when I reminded myself that I was supposed to be in the hospital. There was no way she was waiting for me.

It was probably for Brendan anyway.

Resentment and bitterness welled up inside of me and I nearly stomped to May's apartment in my fury. I stopped and flinched when I heard voices talking inside.

I curiously peeked through the door and raised my eyebrows in shock and anger.

May was crying. She was sitting on her couch with her back against me, but I could hear her sobs and quiet sniffles. Brendan was sitting with her and whispering to her, trying to calm her down. What did that douchebag do to you May! What did he say? Did he break your heart?

My blood was boiling and I was about to beat the crap out of Brendan when May started to speak again.

"This is all my fault.." she whispered. "I should've just told him. It was wrong for me to go behind his back like that."

Arceus, no, May. It's not your fault. You can't help feeling the way you feel. You were just trying to protect me. You didn't do anything wrong.

"But I couldn't leave him," May continued. "I was too scared as to how he would react."

Wait, what? No, this was all wrong. May should never be scared of me. I love her. I would never do anything to hurt her. And if I did...

I shook my head, unable to complete my thought. But she was hurting right now. Over me. Arceus, this was all wrong.

I swallowed the dry lump that had formed in my throat and listened as Brendan whispered something to her. Despite my best efforts, I couldn't hear what he was saying. I wanted to walk over to May and wipe away her tears, do my best to comfort her, soothe her and tell her that I never wanted to leave her side again.

"I wish I could tell him Brendan," May murmured in between her sobs. "Tell him one last time how much he meant to me."

Tell him one last time... Ah, the dry lump in my throat returned. Before I'd had my suspicions but now they were confirmations.

"So.. how are you taking it?"

I shrugged, not bothering to turn to Gary right behind me.

"How did I..?" I asked. I couldn't even say the word.

"You actually fell into a coma at the hospital," he said simply. "But despite your status, the hospital had to cut off your Life Support. You were out for eight months."

I barely took in the words as I stared at May sadly. Brendan was hugging her comfortingly, tracing small circles on her back. I was dead, there was nothing that I could do for her anymore.

"So then who are you?"

Gary smirked. "Believe it or not, I'm an Angel. Seven hundred years and still serving."

I said the first thing that came to mind. "You haven't got any wings," I scoffed.

Gary chuckled, "It's a myth. We manage to blend in more when we're wingless."

A white blinding flash of light shone behind me where the elevator was. I didn't need Gary, the Angel, to tell me what it meant.

Gary put his hand on my shoulder. "It's time to go kid."

"Will I ever see her again?" I was asking more to myself than to Gary.

Gary sighed, "I've seen a lot of lovers wonder about that. But in the end, it won't matter. You'll forget about her once you reach Heaven. Your memory will be erased."

Then Heaven will be Hell for me.

My eyes were still unable to peel themselves away from May. Her tears were streaming down her face even faster now. The sadness etched on her face was so real and genuine.

I watched as Brendan tilted May's chin up to meet his eyes. He smiled comfortingly to May and slowly leaned forward. He gingerly pressed his lips against May's. If my heart were still beating, I knew that it would've shattered. But the lack of a beating heart didn't stop the grief and pain as it washed over me. I was helpless to watch as May did nothing to stop the kiss.

"You know," Gary said in a matter-of-fact tone. "There is another option."

I didn't say anything so he continued. "You could stay here. You'd be a ghost, neither living nor truly dead. You'd wander the world aimlessly and without a purpose. But at least you'd be able to stay with your loved ones until it was their time. But you'd have to find some other way to get into Heaven. There won't be an angel to escort you."

I barely comprehended his words as I watched May and Brendan with a heavy heart. I could stay with May, but that would mean I'd be watching her life without me in it. Instead there would be Brendan. Brendan with May at her wedding. With her while May bore his children. With her until they reached old age. Could I live with that? Could I stay in Hoenn and bear the pain every day and night, knowing that May was with another man? My head spun with grief and I felt my eyes prick uncomfortably.

I heaved on dry sobs. There were no tears for me to shed. I shook my head. I wasn't capable of staying. Staying in Hoenn, or with May. I didn't want to watch her cry for me. I wanted May to be happy, even if it meant her being with Brendan. She needed to let _me_ move on.

I inhaled a deep breath of air and took one last look at May. She was sleeping peacefully against Brendan's chest. There was no crease of worry or grief anywhere on her face. For the first time in a long time, I remembered why I fell in love with her. She was so perfect. Just not for me. We were never meant to be.

"Let's go."

Gary nodded and gently placed his hand on my shoulder again. I turned around and walked into the blinding light of Heaven.

I never looked back.

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><p><strong>Uhh, there's an epilogue. But it's very small, so not sure if I should post it. It's written in May's perspective.<strong>


End file.
